despazito:

memorycycle:

there had to be something like trampolines before we felt the need to make artificial ones . maybe a type of animal we jumped on that went extinct

(via inkbrusher)

badjokesbyjeff:

Three dinosaurs are running across the desert when they stumble upon a magic lamp.

They rub it, and a genie appears.

“I have three wishes, so I’ll give one to each of you,” the genie announces.

The first dinosaur thinks hard.

“Alright,” he says, “I’ll have a big, juicy, piece of meat.”

Instantly, the biggest, juiciest piece of meat he’d ever seen appears in front of him.

Not to be outdone, the second dinosaur thinks even harder.

“I know! I’ll have a shower of meat!”

Immediately, huge pieces of meat rain down around him.

The third dinosaur, certainly not to be outdone, thinks harder than the previous dinosaurs.

“I’ve got it!” he cries, “I want a MEATIER shower!”

clownstrap:

clownstrap:

one thing to miss about porn on tumblr is how ridiculous people acted like. there was this one catfish on here who would steal other people’s dick pics and pretend they were all him. he’d post circumcised one day and uncut the next like… sir.

(via phantom-banned)

thebuginthecornerofyourroom:

Somebody teach the redditors what KUNG POW PENISing is, because we’re gonna get another wave of twitter refugees and we’re gonna need them to know

(via reesee-beesy)

personalphilosophie:

revretch:

Actually all fossil reconstructions are wrong because flesh only evolved recently. Before that it was bone world

(via sndwave)

:

(via haberdashing)

prokopetz:

My favourite thing about the latest Twitter meltdown is all the artists reanimating their dead Tumblr accounts today and immediately being greeted with hundreds of notes because even a Tumblr account they literally have not posted to in 3–5 years has more active and engaged followers than the Twitter account that they’ve been updating daily.

(via ophiocordyceps)

didthekingdieyet:

tiredcat-jpg:

having a blog on tumblr called didthekingdieyet feels like some deep rooted ritual a peasant from the middle ages might enjoy

IT IS A RITUAL

🕯️🕯️🕯️

DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE

🕯️🕯️🕯️

nyanoraptor:

oh it’s over over

(via ophiocordyceps)

necronatural:

phantomrose96:

Wait I realized this Twitter rate limiting thing happened literally the same day as the Reddit 3rd party app shut downs. Wonder how many of those users have come here today to this Luigi Wins By Doing Nothing Ass website

Originally posted by wii-gay

(via phantomrose96)

hyperbali:

hyperbali:

hyperbali:

I kept the error message for posterity lol

So far this seems to mean “every tweet you scroll past counts as reading it” so it means that the entire thing is breaking down for you within minutes

Phony Stark literally strangling it to death

Oh this’d do it

(via g0ji)

paxamericana:

it’s so cool how the search function on every website, a technology that was essentially perfected over a decade ago, is borderline unusable now

(via plounce)

sandersstudies:

sandersstudies:

sandersstudies:

My shadiest actor behavior is that if I’m playing a married role, I wear my real-life wedding band if the person I’m cast with is a friend (or generally a nice person), but if I don’t like them I ask costuming for a costume wedding band.

I’ve never done this but I’m just imagining if a pal suddenly said something rude to me mid-rehearsal and I just slowly took off my wedding band and slid on a fake one.

I was actually always fine wearing my real wedding band to perform until once I got cast with this guy who was so pretentious and condescending that I was like you’re getting your fake marriage privileges revoked

(via unashamedly-enthusiastic)

lathiat:

harald-iii-of-norway:

lathiat:

harald-iii-of-norway:

lathiat:

i know 196 is a reddit thing but like. what does it mean. what do those numbers represent

r/196 is (was?) the successor subreddit to r/195.

r/195 was just a place for some roomates to post memes, and it was named after their apartment number. There was only one rule: if you visit the sub, you must make a post before leaving. The sub eventually grew in popularity, the original members couldn’t keep up with the demands of moderating it, and they closed it down. Soon after, r/196 was born and eventually far outgrew its progenitor.

r/196 also kind of just organically grew into a left-leaning, LGBTQ+ positive space. This was possibly helped because at the start, the only available user flair (a little phrase or icon that appears by your username on posts and comments) was “trans rights”.

oh my god the king of norway from 1046 to 1066 harald iii aka hardrada hi thank you so much welcome to tumblr in the year 2023

Thank you, my thane, for the kind welcome! If only the rest of my subjects were as loyal as lathiat! Truly all that other vikings know today is how to polish their armor and drink mead. They can’t even navigate by the stars or raid a monastary!

hahaha! *quickly glances at harald iii of norway’s wiki*

couldnt be me! im extremely loyal and i love invading places for my king! *wipes sweat from my forehead*

(via unashamedly-enthusiastic)